Kitni baatein...

“You forgot. Isn’t that so?”

“No, actually I had it on my mind. But I thought of rather letting it go away.”

“What? That is… so unlike you.”

“How can you be so sure that I am not this kind of a person?”

“’coz I happen to know you. No, I know you very well.”

“And yet you are not what I want you to be.”

“Why can’t you accept me as I am? I am a friend of yours and promise to stay at your side whenever you need me.”

“I need you and haven’t I told that so many times to you.”

“But I can’t love you in the way you want me to. I have told you innumerable number of times that I am afraid of commitments.”

“Then why don’t you leave me and go away.”

“That is precisely the reason why I can’t go away. You’re too precious for me to lose.”

“What were you saying? Yes, Commitment --- well, that is never a burden. You do not know how many people and to how many number of causes are you committed right now.”

“Maybe, but then I am unaware of that, rather I am not conscious about them. So, they are as good as nothing right now.”

“Your arguments can never be beaten. You know that ‘coz your arguments are so like you --- stubborn and uncompromising.”

“Well, a part of it was correct. I am uncompromising in nature but I am not stubborn.”

“Yes, you are.”

“No, I’m not and even you know that very well.”

“I sometimes feel I do not know you at all. I always have this feeling that the person talking to me is someone different from the person that he actually is. There is always a hidden side of his face, one he wants to keep away from everyone around him. I might be wrong but that’s how I feel.”

“You might be correct.”

“See, again the expression might be correct. What does that mean? Either I am correct or I am not.”

“What I mean is that you are partially correct again?  And I don’t want to go into that story. It’s better to leave that.”

“That’s what I was saying too. You don’t even trust me to keep a secret of yours.”

“It’s not like that. I just want to keep it to myself, something which is too dear for me to share.”

“If it’s painful, you can share it. I would love to be of any help.”

“It’s nothing like that. Let’s just leave this discussion here itself,”

“I am sorry if I hurt you.”

“You are hurting me more by saying that.”

“That makes me even more confused. You care so much and make me unable to forget those feelings I have for you.”

“I said already. You are too precious to lose.”

“Why can’t you just go away from my life and let me forget you?”

“Is that what you really want?”

“No… but it hurts.”

“And that’s why I will always be there for you.”

“But you don’t love me.”

“But you do.”

“Yes.”

“And that’s why I will always be there for you.”

S.R.